JOY

I just saw a site about the Joy of life.
http://www.abraham-hicks.com

JOY TO BLOOM IN STRESS

Just think about what gives you joy. Anybody can dish out umpteen number of situations to experience joy. Don’t say no time. Just go and do it, everything else can wait. Balancing life’s stresses and joys is always a priority.

Science has clearly shown that people who feel as though they've lost control of their life invite heart disease. According to Psychologists loneliness, depression and isolation increases mortality by 3 - 7 times. Deliberately plan at least one joy a day and smile all the stresses away. Even death will wait.

Stress is an integral part of daily life. It improves our coping skills. Joy is the highest expression of happiness and is also essential to healthy living. We need a balance of both stress and joy to live life to the fullest.

( Also refer 'HOW TO INCREASE YOUR SORROW' below)

HOW TO INCREASE YOUR SORROW

It is very simple.

Some unpleasant incidents might have happened in your life-every life has an unending list. Click on any in the list and revisit them as often as you can.

Your mind is always free wherever you are and whatever you are doing.

Make use of your available time to revisit the items in the list..

I can assure you, you will never be happy.

Depression will not be far behind.

YOU CAN BE HAPPY

Every entrepreneur knows that success comes from the belief

you can do it.

Happiness is not an exception. First and foremost I have to believe that I can be happy. When I know that I can be happy I look forward as to how to. Once I search around, the ways and means are everywhere. If I go inside I can find that my mind is stronger than the outside world and I need not be affected if I don’t want to.

Most Important

the belief that I can be happy.

ANY GUSS, WHAT IS HAPPINESS?

After all, what is happiness?

Love, they tell me. But love doesn’t bring and never has brought happiness. On the contrary, it’s a constant state of anxiety, a battlefield: it’s sleepless nights, asking ourselves all the time if we’re doing the right thing. Real love is composed of ecstasy and agony.

All right then, peace. Peace? People say, you go to the woods and you can feel peace. Mother nature is never at peace. One kills the other to survive and that is the order of nature. One chases the other and in effect everybody is chasing and every living being is being chased.

Money brings happiness. Fine. In that case, everyone who earns enough to have a high standard of living would be able to stop work. But then they’re more troubled than ever, as if they were afraid of losing everything. Money attracts money, that’s true. Poverty might bring unhappiness, but money won’t necessarily bring happiness.

I spent a lot of my life looking for happiness, now what I want is joy. Joy is like sex – it begins and ends. I want pleasure. I want to be contented, but happiness? That c an still be elusive.

When I’m with a group of people and I want to provoke them by asking the most important of questions: “ Are you happy?”, they all reply: “Yes, I am”.

The I ask: ‘But don’t you want more? Don’t you want to keep on growing?’ And they all reply: ‘Of course.’

Then I say: ‘So you’re not happy.’ And they change the subject.

RELATIONSHIPS

THE DNA OF HAPPINESS

I have often wondered why do some people behave the way they do. Putting myself into others’ shoes doesn’t give me the answer. I try to visualize what I would have done had I been in his place. That is the best I can go. But that is not the reality. He is a different person, entirely different from me. So I have to speculate. For that I have to understand the other person with his background. In short the entire input into his brain and the basis of his nature. That is difficult. How can I get into his mind, the most complicated part. How can I understand then?

Our educational system frames the questions and teaches us the answers. So when I get the answer it is final and I move on. The same habit is reflected in my social thinking as well. I look for an answer for everything. I automatically stop thinking as soon as I come across the first possibility and treat it as final. Of course I vehemently protect my knowledge by arguing with him or with anyone and everyone. My ego justifies my answer and even refuses to accept any diversion. The real life is however very different from what is taught in schools. There is usually more than one answer. Some answers are much better than others. My first answer need not be the best one. If I can look for a better answer for others’ behaviour from themselves I create relationships, the DNA structure of human happiness

Oxygen, Key to wellbeing

Depression due to lack of oxygen intake?

Depressed moods are common. How to get rid of it? There seems to be no apparent reason for the lack of enthusiasm and self esteem or the depression.

The state of wellbeing comes from the oxygen content in my cells. To increase the oxygen I have to ask my lungs to increase the intake. For that more air has to be pumped into the lungs. How to do it? Increase my body movements mainly the calf muscles . To put it in the best way is ‘exercise’. The more I exercise, the more air is pumped into my lungs and the blood can absorb more oxygen for the cells. Doing some exercise regularly can help people with depression by improving their mental health. It is reported that the feel good brain chemicals such as endorphins are released during exercise.

When my feelings are down I get out and do something physical.

DESIRE VERSUS HAPPINESS.

WHY VILLAGE FOLKS LOOKS MORE HAPPY THAN CITY DWELLERS.

Happiness depends on the intensity of desire or felt need. Satisfaction from food depends on the level of hunger one feels. If my desire is more I will get happiness also more. So to increase happiness I have to increase my desire. If I increase my desire naturally all my abilities will be concentrated on the project. Then the chances of my achieving the result are more. And the happiness I get also will be more.

What will happen when my desire is more than what I can achieve? Unsatisfied desires bring more unhappiness. So if I can reduce my desires I can limit my unhappiness. That is what I saw in my parents. They were my role models. They were a happy lot and enjoyed every success their children made. They did not have big hopes. So they did not have much set backs. Their requirements were limited and they were happy in the village environment. Whatever they got through their children were bonus.

Today my needs are more. My requirements are unlimited and hence I am unhappy. My expectations are very high. More the expectations more unhappy I become. Only limited expectations can give me a reasonable level of wellbeing

HOW TO BE HAPPY

WAY TO HAPPINESS

I feel light when I am happy. Best people I have met have the capacity to laugh at themselves. They joke about themselves. They can find a funny side of every situation. Best speakers crack jokes and bring the situation to lighter level.

I feel more at home when the situation is not very serious. I think I should not take everything seriously. Only very serious matters should be taken seriously. Daily happenings can be taken in a jovial manner. I take time to laugh at myself, the foolish things I have done, the awkward situations I was in. I look at my own positioning in the family, in my group, in the class and among my friends. It is unique. I am sure to be a misfit had I been in anybody else’s body. I am best in my body and in my situation. Enjoy the position, the situation and the life.

Taking life seriously can bring stress. Stress can cause physical and mental discomfort. Face the life as it comes. We cannot change the world and change everything to our liking. Actually I cannot do anything about a lot of things. Why should I worry. I look at what I can do, what is possible by me. I avoid thinking about matters I cannot do anything about. Why waste time. Smile at those situations, crack a joke if I can and enjoy doing what I can. There are even laughing clubs to just laugh without reason to feel good.

HAPPIEST PERSON IN THE WORLD

WHERE IS HAPPINESS

WHERE ARE WE LOOKING FOR HAPPINESS?

Who is the happiest person in the world? That is very difficult to say. At one moment I can be very happy but a few moments later I can be very unhappy. Happiness can come from getting what I expect or getting more than what I expect. Here one thing is certain. The happiness depends on what I expect and not on what I get.

Can I judge the happiness of others? I know what they got and I can calculate their happiness according to what happiness I could have got had I got what others got. I view the world with my mind or outlook. I cannot get into others mind to find out how they feel.

Any material or physical happiness or say pleasure depends on the felt need. The food gives me happiness according to the level of my hunger. The old law of diminishing utility applies in all pleasures. So nobody can get happiness or pleasure through the bodily feelings beyond a certain level. That level is fixed for everybody. Happiness does not depend on my economic, social or physical conditions. The pleasure is directly proposional to the felt need. That brings me to the point that everybody has the same level of happiness.

This means everybody is given a certain level of happiness which comes from the degree of need or sorrow, more the need more the happiness when I get it. More the hunger, more the satisfaction I get from the food. More sorrow, more happiness, less sorrow, less happiness. That means the pluses and minuses in life get neutralized and the ultimate is always zero. Then what should I do in life to get happiness more than the sorrows of my life?

PURPOSE OF LIFE

TO ENJOY LIFE WE NEED PURPOSE,

SACRIFICE FOR A PURPOSE BRINGS HAPPINESS.

Getting up in the morning is a troublesome process. It is too cozy under the blanket to get up. How can anyone get up in this situation? When you want to sleep your mother comes to wake you up. Morning cores like brushing the teeth, shaving, taking bath are all bringing only sadness and mood-offs to us.

But what happens when you want to go and watch the Cricket match between India and Pakisthan. Every action in the morning is enjoyed. Even if you have overslept, when your mother wakes you up , you thank her, give her a kiss and fly off enthusiastically for the morning chores.

What is the difference between the above two situations. The first has no purpose and hence troublesome and begets sadness whereas the second has a purpose and hence enjoyable. So to enjoy life we need purposes. Getting up in the morning is a troublesome process. It is too so cozy under the blanket to get up. How can anyone get up? When you want to sleep your mother comes to wake you up. Morning cores like brushing the teeth, shaving, taking bath are all bringing only sadness and mood-offs to us.

But what happens when you want to go and watch the Cricket match between India and Pakisthan. Every action in the morning is enjoyed. Even if you have overslept, when your mother wakes you up , you thank her, give her a kiss and fly off enthusiastically for the morning cores.

What is the difference between the above two situations. The first has no purpose and hence troublesome and begets sadness whereas the second has a purpose and hence enjoyable. So to enjoy life we need purpose.

HAPPINESS DISTRIBUTION SYSTEM

HOW HAPPINESS IS DISTRIBUTED

What is happiness, joy, contentment, satisfaction, ………?

It all started in the year 1965 when I was a Pre Degree student at St Bercumans, A simple problem came up during the casual discussions with my classmate John.

When he got first class in his SSLC exam he ran home and told his mother. She gave him a banana and that was all. But in the evening his neighbour invited him and all the children nearby for a dinner to celebrate the passing of SSLC exam by his son. John got a first class and he got a banana and the neighbour’s son merely got through his exam and it is being celebrated in a grand style. Is it not an injustice or a paradox? We all had got first classes and we also felt that it is an injustice to us who got higher marks in the exam.

This remained in my mind ever since, churning at different intervals. Slowly it dawned on me that actually his passing created more joy and happiness to him, his parents, friends and relatives than the first classes others got. If others got first class it was expected of them. In case they had not got first class, people would have asked as to what happened. There is nothing to celebrate. But for the boy who could not pass SSLC previous year, this year’s passing is a great achievement and everybody concerned are happy and that happiness turned into celebration. His achievement created more joy and happiness around than the other first classes.

What does it mean?

It means a lot of things. It changed the way I look at the world.
-thonakarajoy@gmail.com